Does a Smile While Scooping the Loop Mean True Love? On Craigslist, They Think So

Road trip!

If you have dogs in need a larger-sized bed, head on down to Kansas City right this instant and help yourself to an extra-large cow-flavored bed.

Huh? Is it made out of a steak? The post doesn’t make a lot of sense, which means it’s classic Craigslist.

Patch gets the point, but this is still just sick and wrong and disrespectful to people who have no place to live but a Dumpster or extra large garbage tote.

And this is kind of peculiar, as is the whole looking-for-love-on-Craigslist phenomenon.

Do people really think that if someone smiles from a passing vehicle they want a date?

They could have gas, for crying out loud. Or it could be that sick little smile people flash when they’re saying “oh, you pathetic fool” in their mind?

Case in point, from Johnston:

“Saw u late evening riding in the passenger seat, u were gorgeous and u seemed interested too... I shoulda said something but got a little shy, I'm sure u won't see this but if you do and was interested maybe we could grab a drink?”

So, unless there’s some promenade, Johnston’s version of scooping the loop, is this really how people hook up?

Same story, different day.

At least there’s a modicum of understanding in West Des Moines that there’s some, understate the facts, silliness in the Craigslist dating ritual.

More Missed Connections Around the Patches

In Waukee, don’t hate him, Carla K. Don’t let your little dog hate him, either. Unless he deserves it.  Pickup love? The double entendre is too delicious here. Also from the western front in this wicked Craigslist dating war, cowboy up.

In Ankeny, he wants to hang out the gone-fishin’ sign. And he just wants to find that good woman because he meets her criteria. Also, was she supposed to wear coveralls?

In Urbandale, who knew the library was such a hot spot? Also, wrong address, right smile.

In West Des Moines, he wants a swim date. And he wants to give the best-smelling biker he’s ever met a ride.

The Thin Line Between Craigslist Love and Lust

A graphic designer isn’t exactly thinking about a design layout here. Neither is he, but at least it’s out there now.

Patch wants to sing a George Thorogood song here. And she doesn’t even like George Thorogood & the Destroyers that well

Oh, and Becky, he has changed.

Sure. Right.

And she’s sorry. It’s just that her personality was warped for a little while. You understand, right? It’s stress, which no doubt produced this superlative-laden plea. “I see you beyond your tough fire retardant suit. You are beauty, strength. You are peace and freedom. You are an enigma. Why won't you let yourself care about me? Why did you walk away? Why did I have to meet you? How can I forget you?”

And Greg, you don’t write off a woman for things she can’t control. You wouldn’t write off a friend who had tourettes, would you? Not that that’s applicable, but do you get the drift?

They’re baaaaack. Mike and CC sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G? Not exactly. Every time he posts, he gets four pervert messages. Coincidence? Catch a clue, CC is not going to call.

Grammar police: “I hope your having a good life and are happy as long as that's true and ill believe it to be true ill manage truly.” What does that even mean?

At least this guy can claim a brain freeze.

There’s a little somethin’-somethin’ here.

And does anyone have a clue here?

Where the hell have you been? Don’t ask. Because, baby, it’s on you.